The Love Answer is Yes: Secure Behavior for Good Feedback

The love moment you waited for has finally come. You prayed and hoped, and now she says “Yes.” Yes to your proposal, to the possibility of forever, to joining hands and hearts on the journey toward marriage. But now a new question arises, “What comes next?” Many people think that a “yes” is the finish line. But, it is really just the start of a deeper, more purposeful phase in the relationship. How you act after that “yes” can strengthen your path to marriage or weaken it through carelessness, pride, or neglect. Let us explore what honorable behavior looks like when the answer is “Yes.”

First, understand that the “yes” is not something you deserve. It is a gift; a willing commitment from another person to draw closer to you. This deserves gratitude and humility. Do not gloat about it, especially in public. Celebrate, yes but keep the mindset of a steward, not a conqueror. Consider the story of Rebekah and Isaac in Genesis 24. When Rebekah agreed to leave her home and marry Isaac, it wasn’t Isaac who boasted. Instead, he waited patiently and treated her with respect. The Bible says, “He loved her, and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death” (Genesis 24:67). Their union began with gentleness and gratitude.

A “yes” is not a license for anything goes. Many Christian couples fall into moral compromises during courtship because they confuse agreement with marriage itself. 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4 reminds us, “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable.”

Set clear boundaries together:

• How often will you meet?
• Will meetings be in public or private spaces?
• What level of physical affection is appropriate for both of you?
• Will you have accountability partners?
• Remember, true love honors God first.

After a “yes,” communication should deepen, not only in frequency but also in depth.

• Discuss your life visions.
• Share spiritual journeys.
• Talk about family expectations.
• Discuss financial mindsets.
• This is the time to know, understand, and connect.

Involve Spiritual Mentors Early: Do not take this path alone. Involve your pastors, mentors, or a godly couple to guide you both. They can help you address topics you might overlook. Like conflict resolution, family planning, or managing cultural differences. Proverbs 15:22 says, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

There is no stronger bond in a Christian relationship than prayer. Praying together before marriage nurtures spiritual intimacy. It is the kind of closeness that goes beyond feelings. Pray for:

• Purity and strength against temptation.
• Clarity of purpose.
• Peace in your families regarding your union.
• God’s guidance in wedding preparations.

It is natural to share good news with friends, family, and even on social media. But discernment is important. Some news should stay between the two of you. Some, between you and your spiritual leaders until the time is right. Public announcements too early can expose your relationship to undue scrutiny, jealousy, or spiritual attacks. Remember Mary, the mother of Jesus Christ. When she received her divine assignment, “she treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart” (Luke 2:19). There is wisdom in waiting to share until things are more established.

The joy of mutual affection can sometimes lead couples to idolize one another, putting the relationship above God. This is risky. Keep Christ at the center. If your schedules revolve entirely around one another with little time for personal growth, ministry, or friendships, then the balance is off.

Grace said yes to Daniel after months of prayer. But instead of rushing into endless dates and selfies, they set a structure:

1. One prayer meeting together per week.
2. Monthly check-ins with their mentor couple.
3. Bi-weekly discussions on finances, faith, and family.

By the time they married a year later, they had built a foundation not just of love, but also of shared values, faith, and purpose. Grace says, “Saying yes was sweet, but growing together in wisdom was sweeter.”

Father, thank you for this ‘yes’ that brings joy to my heart. Teach us to honor you in this relationship. Guide our conversations, guard our purity, and grant us wisdom to build a love story that reflects your grace. Amen.

A “yes” is a divine gift. Treat it with respect. Let your behavior honor not just your future spouse but also God, who weaves love stories with eternity in mind. Walk this path with humility, purity, prayer, and purpose. When you do, your journey to the altar will not only be about the wedding day but also about building a lasting marriage.